【Secret Confessions (2025) Wifey's BFF Episode 48】
The Secret Confessions (2025) Wifey's BFF Episode 48remake of Stephen King's Itcame out this weekend, and despite it breaking box office records for a horror movie, a lot of reviews critiqued the film for not being scary enough.
We've compiled a list of things the Itclown should've transformed into in order to make the film really be frightening.
SEE ALSO: The striking differences between Stephen King's 'It' and the '90s mini seriesGet your night lights ready.
You May Also Like
I mean, it's pretty obvious that if the Itclown turned into dinosaurs, we would all be more afraid.

There is so much of the universe that is as yet unexplored, and yet Stephen Hawking predicts that humans will be living on another planet within the next thousand years. Imagine Pennywise embodying the concept of our primarily undiscovered understanding of a never-ending outer space. Terrified yet?

The number of cyclists hit by cars per year would be a truly shocking thing for the clown from It to transform into, especially since 20% of the movie was kids on bikes. For example, in 2015, 5,376 people were killed in crashes, which amounts to 15 people per year. If the clown transformed into a FiveThirtyEightstyle graph of that statistic, everyone would be scared, and not just people who are scared of graphs. Are you wondering how you're going to sleep tonight? Us too.

There's nothing more eerily mysterious than tall grass. What could be in there? A snake? A mountain lion? A snake being eaten by mountain lions like a spaghetti noodle and you're to be their delicious meat sauce? Put a red balloon in the equation and I'm sleeping in my roommate's bed for the next week.

Fuck, the statistic on how many pedestrians get hit by cars per year is even more horrifying. Imagine Pennywise riding a bar graph of those numbers like an evil slide then devouring you at the end.

And I would scream and run out of the theater before I saw the end of it if theclown from Ittransformed into that God damn scary alien from E.T. the Extra-Terrestrial.

Hopefully the sequel will include some of these ideas to make the Itfranchise unquestionably terrifying.
Thanks for reading Mashable Humor: original comedy every day. Or most days. We're people, just like you, and we're trying our best.
Topics Stephen King
Search
Categories
Latest Posts
Inside the Murky Process of Getting Games on Steam
2025-06-26 08:11Best vacuum deal: Save $100 on Dyson V11
2025-06-26 07:55Best smartwatch deal: Save $132 on Garmin Forerunner 955
2025-06-26 06:07NYT mini crossword answers for April 9, 2025
2025-06-26 05:46This fat bear's before and after photos are stunning
2025-06-26 05:31Popular Posts
NYT mini crossword answers for May 9, 2025
2025-06-26 07:42Best Sony 75
2025-06-26 05:51Microsoft Surface Pro 11 deal: Get $450 off at Best Buy
2025-06-26 05:33Bargaining For the Common Good
2025-06-26 05:28Featured Posts
Best vacuum mop combo deal: Save $140 on the Tineco Floor One S5
2025-06-26 08:11Nintendo Switch 2 tariff impacts: What we know so far
2025-06-26 06:31NYT mini crossword answers for April 11, 2025
2025-06-26 05:29The Sound and the “Furious”
2025-06-26 05:29Popular Articles
Tech giants rush shipments before tariff deadlines
2025-06-26 07:59Google works with The Sphere to show 'Wizard of Oz' in 16K
2025-06-26 07:43Best TV deal: Get an 85
2025-06-26 05:46Best Max streaming deal: Save 20% on annual subscriptions
2025-06-26 05:43Newsletter
Subscribe to our newsletter for the latest updates.
Comments (6859)
New Knowledge Information Network
Against Fear
2025-06-26 07:37Time Information Network
Best board game deals: Take up to 47% favorites like Catan, Azul, Ticket to Ride, and more.
2025-06-26 07:26New Knowledge Information Network
'Yellowjackets' Season 3 ending explained: We finally know who Pit Girl is
2025-06-26 06:24Leadership Information Network
'Black Mirror' Season 7: 'Bête Noire's twisty ending, explained
2025-06-26 05:47Inspiration Information Network
The State of PC Gaming in 2016
2025-06-26 05:30